Righto... Just now, much feels like it was in the 90s... How come I think of that. Well, I can only speak for the living in Berlin as I see it. But could be much possible that this is common everywhere- well maybe in different ways, but common the thought self.
I remember in the 90s many students came to town to the university, study hard and party also hard together with all the people who work from monday to friday. Thought we party a lot to in the 90s, we never had so much alcohol and not at all that much Vodka and Gin and the drugs they used where not that strong as today. And all the young stars... so similar to what we had in the 90s.
And the clubs, the moved in the 90s into new locations. And this is what they are doing now again. Od, isn't it? Little museums change their place too and we have open and experimental exhibitions.
So many foreign people came in the 90s like today. So many moved from another country to Germany or German moved to another country.
And so many young people where living together as today in flats and having birthday parties and breakfast and brunch and lunch and all that stuff with so much fun.
But then, the feeling... That all are working so much and hard and are exhausted in the end and kind of feel that this is just the calm before the storm. Cos everyone seems to party and go out and try to enjoy every single sunshine, making picnic and making babies as this is the last chance to do it. I actually have the feeling like in the 90s that it is the best time to learn, to study, to go back to school...like this.
I remember that we had a raise of birth numbers in the 90s as we have the last years.
Isn't it crazy that the parties with the music of the 90s are so successful? Everyone feels fine there and everyone is trying to have fun and find someone to have sex with and everyone is talking about love but fears it also and then all those groups going out together as in the 90s...
And all those talking about politic an the start of awareness that we have to just do more then telling and talking... We have to go on the streets.
The raise of the rent was in the 90s the same fast and hard to take and did change our style of living.
Many moved in the 90s because of this fact and so do we today. The bubble is growing as in the 90s so today but I have the feeling of that the bubble is growing much faster and the next crisis is just on the next corner, but so it seems that next to everyone is waiting for the moment and expecting to come.
And when I think of the 90s I think of the start of computers for everyone and everyone had a phone and how this changed our life in the last 20 years. Can't help but wonder what technology will come now to change our life and science is on a new top, but also the question of what is true. Like in politics. I mean it seems we are very much on the place where we have been before the wall was broken.
And isn't it funny that in the 90s we had a lot of "marry me" talking, although today we talk about marriage equals- the right for everyone to marry.
I remember that it also was a time for a to come out of the closet and today we talk like that time about transexual here.
And another fact is funny too -more or lesson... all those repairing in town... all those we have to save money at work. All those renewing of old things. Or keeping up the good work or trying to survive the job or keep the work alive. To earn money which seems to get lost in space.
Seems it is no wonder that series with conservative content and family strories have become so popular and all those TV shows about ancient times...
As if someone is trying to keep you blind and entertain, so you don't look to close what's really happening.
And those vegetarian food... something I know well from the 90s and the fact that we where showing pics of how bad we tread our animals we eat and food and nature. But sadly we forgot the past and so we maybe try to teach each of us again to wake up and change our habits.
And that's what I wonder after all. We started yoga and now it's popular and we started bio and now it's popular... we started a lot but most of us did not changed the habit and so the core of our problems stayed the same... Isn't it like that?
Still want to be amused. Still afraid to lose. Still to weak to see?
Just questioning and thinking...
LOVE & LIGHT
First of May the international day of work... Well am not gonna write about this today... but welcome into the month May and I hope it will be a good for everyone...
Today I will write about another Movie I think you should watch if you have the time or possibilities.
The Play is taken place in ex-Jugoslavia and the idea is from a real happening from 2008 where on an open Place in Belgrade people where hurt and killed by nazis and hooligans next to the police who just stood there and did nothing then watch. A shame.
So the core of the story has a true event.
And now, what is it about?
Two pairs of which each one is fighting for his relationship. A partner in crime they became. Something like this happen. Means, you see how much you are able to do for your beloved one and so the man who wants to marry his girlfriend has to help another man who wants that his man can make his dream real. A dream of a parade who will show that it is o.k. to be gay and also the wedding will be made by this man with the dream of freedom. Also the movie shows the time after the war.
First time a movie from ex-Jugoslavia is made to show the peace time and it therefor shows the war veterans and the live they are living and the connection they have. Although they are the losers, but so it seems that a pair of losers is never alone.
A serious issue is here shown in the style presented by means of the drama and tragedy, but most of all of comedy. Which is the best they could do, because you smile a lot, laugh a lot and after all the cry and joy you had you just think in the end, that this movie was and is wonderful.
And most important I felt very grateful for the life I am living and also I am so much aware of the fact that we still have to do a lot and go on the streets.
I also heard that nazis and hooligans after watching the movies hate the movie because they could not hate gays anymore. That's not that bad.
But let's go on...
The lines are great and situation comedy makes it to believe that all this is or could be real and the actors just play so nice and every figure you see.. you just like to follow and watch. The voltage decreases steadily until the end.
So, this movie also shows "normal" people in meaning of look and acting. Not like the hollywood beauties and beasts. Yes that maybe needs a little work from you, when you watch the movie in the beginning, cos it takes time in the beginning to know each human and who he is or what he is and that is very good I think. But don't worry it doesn't take a long time.
The start in a drama style and then break it with suddenly comedy coming up... smart. Lovely situations. Just can tell this. The rest is what we call spoilers. So you gotta watch the movie to get to know more.
LOVE & LIGHT
Last week I saw my dear "Dr Who" again and there was the part when the Doctor is landing in the future New New York... People tried to sell "happy-happy" buttons to put on your skin to be happy and in a good mood. As if we need that... But sometimes we have the feeling we need that. How come?
Actually last week I also read a book where they wrote that science has found out that the evolution had made this negative mood of fear and to see what may come up in a dramatic and dangerous way in our personal future really the most successful part in surviving as mankind. We use to think first negative. That's our nature. Crazy though. But actually seems to be very true. Also they wrote that we know that thoughts become reality. Cos they have energy and that lead us to happenings which are also what we feel and think. More interesting is, that we will not live better with less negative thoughts, but we can catch up the positive thoughts and make them bigger and so our reality will follow, even we have bad days and sad moods too and as I said they are no less negative moods, but being a human means you can change your thoughts. So little, but so hard. Right? Isn't it?!
Can we change so fast? What about three months to try it. Three months of daily meditation- just ten minutes per day? Or three months of only visualize a positive and productive future? Just three months to try, every day?
Science has showed that this would be enough to change to brighten and broaden your mind and personality. Does this sound good?
Well, I learned that my body is changing next to every day, every part. Most body cells live just a few days. Your taste buds just lives some hours. Your white blood cells lives about ten days. Your muscle cells are to change every three months.
Science says that we change about 1% of our body cells every day!
So... after 3- 4 months we have changed our body cells nearly 100%!
Even your brain cells die and there will be new ones.
Your lifestyle also gives kind of a signal of how fast cells changes. Are you mostly sitting passive then it makes the cells die faster. Are you more active, then more new cells will be born.
So having positive thoughts can lead to an easier live, thought that sounds not possibly for many.
But science has also shown the last 20 years that positive moods can give you a better health and a your stress hormones become less, also you surely all have heard of people who where very sick but survived or lived much longer with their disease.
Kathleen Light has showed in her work that just a simple hug or another body contact between people every day can make your health stronger. Do you give or get every day a hug or better some more or some other body contact- like hand to hand... then your Oxytocin is getting up, which is good for your health.
It also helps to touch the neck or the shoulder warmly from your partner and this will make you stronger, even know that a cold will come from time to time too. ;-)
So positive feelings have helped also to survive for mankind. Cos this way the possibility to find new ideas, new ways was much bigger, cos your mind is brighter and more open then when you are sad.
But those positive thoughts makes you stronger for the storms in life. The negative moods and all the fear and hate and shame won't be less they are part of our life, but we can take the power away from them. So... won't you try? Maybe you start watching after the name Barbara I. Fredrickson and the you read about the numbers of results so many scientists have got. Maybe that makes you believe it more.
Or maybe you think of a day which went bad and then tell me how you feel and then think of the same day, how everything went well or turned out another, positive way... Like: you could be angry that you woke up late and the time is short and your kid is screaming after you and you just think, why me and shit and how many times do I have to tell my kid not to scream after me.... Or: you wake up late and smile you have slept well and longer and that it was time for that 'cos so long ago that you woke up not too earlier and now you see the sun outside the window and so you smile, although the time is short you just change your planes for the day and while you hear your child scream you ask yourself what's wrong and go to your kid and hug it and say that everything's o.k. and maybe you cuddle a bit together before starting the rest of the day...
What if....?
Maybe...!
LOVE & LIGHT
Another movie to recommend and this movie is a low budget film.
It's sure no "Hollywood" style, but very pure.
Made in Berlin in Marzahn. It shows very pure and easy the way of living in east Berlin and so the colors are quite a bit unusual for most of us to watch in a movie.
But don't give up and wait a second when you see the movie on TV or DVD.... It's worth the waiting.
The movie is hard to put in a genre, cos it's funny but not comedy, it's sad, but not a sad film, it's earnest but not a dull movie.
The film has some moments in silence and then others in action. The talkin' is very natural and the acting too.
So this film is first of all a film about the simple live- live itself, then it is a film about a mother and her son, who is living with her, because she has dementia. At least the film is also the bitter sweet version of a love from two people coming up.
What I liked is, that all the cliches and stereotypes where broken and you feel real good with this. It also shows that we may think about how we act with older people... and yeah with people who are not mainstream.
The grandmother in the movie, the actress is actually 89 years old when she made the movie with her grandson. She is so lovely.
The story has some turning and all of them are very good to follow, even you will be surprised but never be disappointed.
I must confess that I smiled most of the time watching the movie and can only recommend it to watch for everyone, cos seems the movie has touched very different people in different countries where they showed the movie on festivals.
So... a little but very much worth time out for you... except you only like the hollywood style, then this movie will maybe be to much for you...
LOVE & LIGHT
Heute auf dem Weg von der Arbeit, in der S-Bahn sitzend, erlebte ich folgende Situation.
Vor mir eine Mutter mit zwei Kindern, die auf einen Mann, der nebenan sass erst irritiert, dann etwas mit Unbehagen und zum Schluss mit Ablehnung reagierten. Es war zu erkennen, das sie ihn als eher gefährlich und unangenehm einstuften. Die Mutter jedoch erklärte den Kindern nichts und reagierte auch nicht auf deren Reaktion.
Was nun aber war an diesem jungen Mann so besonders?
Ich hätte es meinen Kindern erklärt.
Er war jung, sah durchaus ungepflegt und schmutzig aus und hatte seltsame Bewegungen, Reaktionen und Aktionen.
Er hatte sichtbar Zwangshandlungen und Ticks.
Er blätterte in einer Zeitschrift, hielt an, sagte etwas für uns unverständliches, blätterte die Zeitung zu, machte Gesten, als wenn er sich etwas versichern wollte, drehte die Zeitung zweimal um und fing von vorne an, immer und immer wieder.
Ein Zwang kann jedwede Handlung sein. Die Logik erschliesst sich dem aussenstehenden meist nicht, aber sie wiederholt sich von ein zweimal bis unendlich viele Male oder acht mal und dann Pause und von vorne. In der Regel sind sie ungefährlich, zumindest für aussenstehende. Das Paradoxe ist, dass der Zwang aus Unsicherheit entsteht und doch gleichzeitig den Betroffenen Sicherheit gibt, da er sich mit der Handlung seiner selbst vergewissert.
Nun setzte sich ein neuer Fahrgast ihm gegenüber und schimpfte kurz darüber, das dieser junge Mann seine Beine auf dem Sitz hatte.
Glücklicherweise reagierte der Mann "nur" damit, das er seine Beine runter nahm und sie kreuzte. Eine Schutzgeste.
Jedoch fingen seine Zwangshandlungen an sich zu verstärken und es kamen jetzt Ticks hinzu, die auch scheinbar ein Teil der Zwangshandlung waren.
Ticks können Bewegungen sein, Gesichtszuckungen, Schulterzucken oder auch Töne, Wörter.
In unserem Fall waren es kurze hustenähnliche Töne und gelegentlich ein Pfeifen.
Das kann einen Unwissenden und insbesondere ein Kind irritieren und Angst machen.
Dabei sind solche betroffenen Gefangene ihrer selbst und in der Regel ungefährlich.
Jetzt folgte aber eine kurze Unterbrechung und er schaute scheinbar die Kinder an und sagte etwas unverständliches.
Hier sei allen geraten davon auszugehen, das uns immer verborgen bleiben wird, was derjenige sieht und wahrnimmt. Er könnte uns als böse Gesichter sehen, oder als farbige Muster, oder als freundliche Wesen, als Lehrer oder Engel oder er nimmt uns nicht einmal wahr und sieht etwas ganz anderes.
Denn beachte, wir können zwar die Ticks und Zwangshandlungen sehen, aber nicht, was sonst in dem Kopf eines anderen Menschen vorgeht.
Ob er Schizophren ist oder depressiv, manisch oder Wahnhaft. Wir wissen es nicht und darum hier die wichtigsten Tipps die ich geben kann im Umgang mit solchen Betroffenen.
Am wichtigsten: Sprechen sie ihn nie an, ausser sie sind in einem Park oder auf einem grossem Platz.
Der viele/ grosse/ weite und vor allem ruhige Platz ist wichtig, damit sie sich sicher genug fühlen können, ohne in Stress zu geraten, denn das verschlimmert die Situation für alle Beteiligten.
Zweitens: setzen sie sich möglichst weiter weg von ihm und sorgen sie gegebenenfalls dafür, das die Plätze um die Betroffenen leer bleiben, denn so bleibt der Stresspegel niedrig. Viele Betroffene brauchen viel Raum, um sich sicher zu fühlen.
Des weiteren, auch wenn sie es gut meinen, nicht umarmen. Fragen sie keinesfalls was sie tun können, wohin er will oder ob er/ sie etwas zu essen oder Trinken möchte. Es irritiert die Betroffenen und sie können häufig mit dem Eindringen in ihre Privatsphäre nicht gut umgehen, dass heisst der Stresspegel steigt, sie werden nervös und misstrauisch und die Situation wird weniger kontrollierbar für alle Beteiligten.
Erklären sollte man es den Kindern unbedingt. In ganz normaler Lautstärke, so wie man eben Gespräche führt, denn zu lautes Reden oder zu leises sorgt wieder für erhöhten Stress und Misstrauen und kann Ticks verstärken. Den Kindern sollte man aber gleichzeitig sagen, das sie dabei die Eltern oder aus dem Fenster schauen sollen, um die Aufmerksamkeit nicht auf sich zu lenken, zum Schutze des Betroffenen.
Wenn Sie wirklich helfe wollen, müssen sie Zeit mitbringen, Ruhe und viel Geduld. Holen sie sich dazu immer professionelle Hilfe heran.
Es gibt den psychiatrischen Notdienst, die Polizei (bei Eigen- und Fremdgefährdung) und andere Hilfsorganisationen.
Sollte jemand sich selbst oder dabei sein andere zu gefährden oder bereits dabei sein, rufen sie immer die Polizei und wenn es geht den Psychiatrischen Notdienst dazu.
Sorgt immer dafür das alle ausser Reichweite gehen. Keinesfalls festhalten oder den Weg abschneiden! Das fördert die Aggressivität und das Misstrauen des Betroffenen und dieser kann sehr grosse Kräfte entwickeln, seien diese auch noch so kleine Personen.
Sie können auch unbeobachtet den betroffenen fotografieren und Ort und Tageszeit sich notieren und dies an die Obdachlosenhilfe oder anderen Hilfsorganisationen und auch der Polizei weitergeben, wenn der Verdacht besteht, dass die Betroffenen auf der Strasse leben. Das ist gelegentlich der Fall. Leider.
Allerdings sollte jeder Helfer wissen, das, wenn keine Eigen- und Fremdgefährdung besteht, nicht immer psychiatrisch geholfen werden kann und die Polizei oder andere Helfer "unverrichteter" Dinge gehen müssen. Dies ist vom Gesetzt so geregelt und die Betroffenen wollen nicht immer das man ihnen hilft, erkennen Hilfe nicht immer als solche oder sehen sich als gesund oder als einzige Normale an. Auch kann uns das Ausmass viel schlimmer erscheinen, als es die Betroffenen selbst empfinden, denn gerade Ticks und Zwangshandlungen bestehen sehr lange bevor sie auffällig werden und sind somit häufig bereits normaler Bestandteil des alltäglichen Lebens und der Leidensdruck hat sich verschoben bzw. die Grenzen der Eigenwahrnehmung zum Problem.
In meinem Fall schien der junge Mann durchaus unter seinen Ticks zu leiden, denn er fing kurz leise an zu weinen und vergrub sein Gesicht in seine verschränkten Arme und schien sich mit den Händen am Rücken selber zu trösten und zu beruhigen.
Ich wünschte die Kinder und auch der Mann der daneben sass, würden diesen jungen Mann mit weniger Unsicherheit, Unwissenheit und Ekel ansehen. Es war ein trauriger Anblick und ich hoffe, da draussen gibt es jemanden, der sich tatsächlich um ihn kümmert oder in Zukunft kümmern wird. Zu wünschen währe es ihm. Helfen konnte ich ihm in dem Moment in der S-Bahn nicht, aber ich kann ihm das Beste wünschen und ihm mit Respekt begegnen.
Und ich kann dankbar für mein eigenes Leben sein, das sich doch so gut entwickelt hat.
Licht & Liebe
